A Love Letter - Of Sorts

To the One God has chosen for me,

I've been thinking about you a lot lately.  I find myself wondering who you are...What do you do?  Do you sit at a desk all day?  Do you teach?  Coach?  Fight fires, or catch bad guys?  What do you look like?  Are you tall?  Blond?  Brunette?  I'll be shocked if you have red hair, but I guess that doesn't mean you don't. 

And where are you?  Do you live here, or in another city?  And are you a stranger or have we met and just weren't ready for each other? 

I have so much to tell you, so much to share.  After all, I have 25 years of experiences you don't know.  And I can't wait to hear about all the moments of your life I haven't been a part of.  What stories will your family and friends tell me?  How embarrassed will you be?  I have plenty of my own that are embarrassing...But I know you'll enjoy hearing them as much as I will enjoy hearing yours.

I don't always wonder about you, you know, although lately it does seem like you've been occupying more of my thoughts.  I lead a good, happy, full life.  I give a lot of love and receive even more in return.  I am surrounded by people who lift me up and keep me going when I don't know that I can.

But more and more lately I have felt like something is missing.  It's not something necessary for survival.  It's like I feel like I'm missing a rib.  I'm not quite whole, and yet - if I had to - I could lead a complete and happy life.  The missing rib just gives me a pang every now and again.

You are my missing rib, and I am yours - and that's just the way it is.  And until I find you no other rib will do.  I can't settle for one that seems appealing, but doesn't fit.  I won't.  So I wait for you.

Sometimes I get impatient, and the wait seems unbearable, but that's a struggle in every part of my life.  Can I apologize for that now?  I can be very patient with people (small children, especially), but when I want something I have a horribly hard time waiting for it.

Do you have a hard time waiting for me?  Or are you just living your life, blissfully unaware as of yet that your rib is out here, waiting for you to find her? 

I know it's God's timing, God's will, that I am waiting on.  And until He deems us both ready I will continue to wait.  I pray for you every night.  I am so excited to meet you.  Take care of yourself until I can help take care of you.

Love,

Steph

An Un-Love Letter

Dear Guy Outside of Starbucks,

You may think you are really cool, but I have some news for you.  Sitting down at a table already occupied by two girls and announcing your presence by saying, "Okay.  Girl talk.  Let's go." doesn't really endear you to them.  It actually makes them wonder - if only for a moment - whether or not you are gay.

When, after that moment of wonder, they decide you are not, in fact, gay, the annoyance of a jerk disrupting their one-on-one time - of which they get little - begins to set in.  When they sit back in their chairs and cross their arms across their chest while mimicking your mocking tone it is not an invitation to keep talking.  It is a subtle 'girl hint' to move on with your morning.

When you begin to turn the conversation toward evangelizing ("I just got back from church...all condescending because I have a relationship with God?") and your targets inform you of their own relationship with God, and that they do attend church on a regular basis, I don't think that paves the way for the 'pick-up' conversation.  Really.  It is confusing and annoying.

When one of the girls tells you she has a boyfriend and you announce, "I can't talk to you anymore," but then in the next breath tell her about your baby and how beautiful she is and that you make beautiful babies, well, don't follow it with, "You should remember that when your boyfriend dumps you."  Believe it or not, insulting someone is not a way to get them to go out with you.

And when one of the girls calls you out on your lameness, throwing a piece of trash at her and telling her to stop talking does not make you seem less lame.  In fact, I think I can safely say it increases the level of douche-baggery that comes across.

Was it strangely entertaining to talk to you?  Yeah...If "entertaining" means being annoyed by the weird guy who would make an interesting foil to a protagonist in a story.  Sure.  It was strangely entertainng to talk to you.  Do I ever want to see you again?  No.  You give off very untrustworthy vibes: never taking off your sunglasses, talking crap about your ex, that mean, disdainful tone of voice you used.  I appreciate the character inspiration, but apart from that I never need to see you again.

Oh yeah!  One more thing.  Don't pick up a stranger's coffee cup - especially if the stranger is a girl.  It's just creepy, and it ruined a perfectly good cup of coffee.

Sincerely,

Steph